“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you.” – Dan Millman
The Overthinking Trap
Do you ever feel like your mind is running in circles, replaying past mistakes, worrying about the future, or obsessing over the smallest details? You’re not alone. Overthinking is one of the most common mental habits that lead to stress, anxiety, and even decision paralysis.
While thinking critically is valuable, excessive rumination can prevent you from taking action and enjoying the present moment. The good news? You can train your mind to break free from this cycle. By using Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) techniques, you can regain control and transform your thought patterns for a more peaceful and productive life.
Understanding Overthinking
Overthinking often disguises itself as problem-solving, but in reality, it creates more problems than it solves. It typically takes two forms:
- Rumination: Replaying past events and wondering “What if?”
- Worrying: Creating worst-case scenarios about the future.
Psychologists suggest that overthinking stems from fear—fear of failure, rejection, or making the wrong choice. But when you learn to shift your mindset, you can replace anxiety-driven thoughts with empowering ones.
How NLP Can Help Stop Overthinking
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a powerful coaching method that helps you rewire your thought patterns. Here’s how it can help you break free:
1. Reframing Your Thoughts
Instead of seeing challenges as roadblocks, NLP teaches you to reframe them as opportunities. If you catch yourself thinking, “I always mess up,” reframe it to, “I am learning and growing from every experience.”
2. The Power of Anchoring
Anchoring is an NLP technique that helps you associate a positive emotion with a specific action. For example, you can create a calming anchor by pressing your thumb and index finger together while recalling a peaceful memory. With practice, this simple movement can trigger a sense of calm when you start to overthink.
3. Pattern Interrupts
NLP introduces “pattern interrupts” to break repetitive thoughts. If you find yourself stuck in a loop, do something unexpected—stand up, splash cold water on your face, or count backward from 100. This shocks your brain out of its usual cycle and forces it to reset.
How REBT Helps You Regain Control
Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), developed by psychologist Albert Ellis, helps people recognise and change irrational beliefs that fuel overthinking.
1. Identifying Irrational Thoughts
Ask yourself: Is this thought based on facts, or is it based on fear? REBT helps you challenge irrational assumptions like, “I must be perfect, or I will fail.”
2. Turning Self-Criticism into Self-Compassion
Overthinkers tend to be their own worst critics. Instead of saying, “I should have done better,” shift to, “I did my best with the knowledge I had at the time.”
3. Accepting Uncertainty
One of the biggest causes of overthinking is the need for certainty. REBT teaches that uncertainty is a natural part of life. By embracing it, you free yourself from the stress of needing to control everything.
Practical Steps to Stop Overthinking Today
Here are some simple yet effective ways to start taking control of your thoughts:
1. Set a “Worry Time”
Instead of overthinking all day, allocate 10-15 minutes daily for “worry time.” Write down your concerns, then move on. This helps contain your worries and prevents them from taking over your day.
2. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness brings your focus back to the present. When you find yourself lost in thought, take a deep breath, notice your surroundings, and engage with the present moment.
3. Take Action
Overthinking often leads to inaction. If a decision is overwhelming you, set a deadline, make the best choice possible, and remind yourself that no decision is permanent.
4. Shift Your Focus
When stuck in an overthinking loop, shift your attention to something productive—exercise, listen to music, or engage in a creative hobby.
Final Thoughts
As author Eckhart Tolle wisely said, “Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose.” Breaking free from overthinking doesn’t happen overnight, but with the right techniques, you can retrain your mind to focus on solutions rather than fears.
If you’re struggling with overthinking and want to develop a more positive, action-driven mindset, coaching can help. As a certified coach specialising in NLP, Emotional Intelligence, and REBT, can guide you through techniques that will empower you to take control of your thoughts and your life.
Ricardo Barriga 
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